Sooooo……some shit went down. If my life was a movie poster that would be the tagline. I started reading a few of the hilarious blogs out there in an effort to get in touch with the world outside that my new situation has made me a part of. ( I have to take a second to appreciate how the words “new situation” just cover all manner of crazy.) Oh, right! I was talking about blogs. I found some great ones! These girls are high energy, hilarious and beautiful in their world view. Girls being the operative word. Because at 26 and single with no kids tagging along behind them I cant help but reason; while they may be funny (and seriously, they are) they aren’t going to have a lot to say that resonates with the thirty something, divorced moms out there doing our damnedest to defy the statistical status quo and keep a little humor in the mix.
And I figured that since another blogger is everything the world needs right now I could put words to paper and hash through the cathartic process of self-documentation. I thought of doing a thirty something theme, or a mom theme, or just a humor bit now and then. Maybe calling it “Life Among the Littles” or “Where is my Gold Star?” Then I figured well, its all one big messy hilarious disaster so why shave off the best material for the sake of a theme.? The complexity, the struggle, that’s where the good stuff is. It’s in the elements of the ridiculous. Ie: When you’re at the front door talking to the fence repair man (something your former husband would have attended to….eventually) and your youngest child pops up behind you holding your bullet asking you what it is because she’s been snooping in mommies goody drawer. I can’t be the only person that has happened to right? Right…..?! So yea, its mortifying and comical in that “please find a rock or a hole or an anvil right the hell now bc I’m melting into my humiliation” kind of way. Yes my heart was pounding in my ears and I actually felt my face turn 6 shades of red. There it is though, that’s life as I know it. Incidentally my fence looks fantastic!
I think for some people, even those who know me really well, there will be a few delightful little shock and awe’s. It’s going to come to light that I swear….a lot. I use sarcasm and humor as my native language and sometimes (All. Of. The. Times) a thick and juicy cuss word is too perfect to pass up. Like it literally feels good to say them. I love it. I usually cater to my audience in conversation and in an effort to be pleasing I keep it classy, deferential to their sensibilities. But some of me gets lost in that translation and I have to cut that shit out. With the past 2 years of my life having not actually killed me (there were moments when I wondered) I simply cannot seem to muster a fuck to give to the oversensitive. Gonna put it out there with as much or as little raw material as I like. See…..with the naughty words…..I’m giggling…and it’s Monday. You should get to giggle on Monday.
femaleforward.blog 